Greetings, mortals. I come to you today because there has
been a particular topic that’s been making my ass itch the last few months.
Now, I know we are collectively trying to wash the stain of shit that was
season 8 of Game of Thrones from our garments, but let’s be real. Once the pain
and anguish has been purged from our system, we will be doing DEEP dives into
how and why that final season was such a travesty. However, there is a certain
item that I want to dig into right now and that is how much D&D changed
(hated) the lore surrounding dragons from A Song of Ice and Fire. There are two
glaring inconsistencies in regards to dragons I noticed from my time reading on
the ASOIAF lore and comparing it to what we saw in the show. And I am certain
they were lazily omitted in an effort to keep the show moving with a sense of
vulnerability for Daenerys. So, without further ado, let’s get into it!
First, I want to give a rundown of what dragons are in the ASOIAF
lore so that you can get an understanding of how they were meant to be
portrayed by GRRM.
- - Magical creatures, which originally existed on the continent of Essos but came to Westeros when the Targaryens sailed across the Narrow Sea following the Doom of Valyria.
- - They are scaled, reptilian creatures with four limbs: two wings and two rear legs.
- - They have strong jaws, razor sharp teeth and claws, leathery wings, long necks, long tails and horns in an almost crown like formation on their heads.
- - Provided it had food and freedom, dragons never stopped growing.
- - It was said that dragons were fire made flesh and great heat emanated from their bodies.
- - Dragon scales were largely, but not entirely, impervious to flame and as they aged their scales thickened and grew harder, to the point that their hide was pretty much impenetrable.
So, with that quick summary I think you get a pretty good idea
of what GRRM envisioned when he created his version of dragons. The first
inconsistency I wanted to speak upon is regarding how tough dragon hide was. Please take a look at the below excerpt
from “Fire and Blood”:
Within that excerpt, you can see in the highlighted text
that a full-grown dragon’s scales were harder than steel and even arrows were
no more than an irritant to them. In fact, the only reason Meraxes, the dragon
of Queen Rhaenys Targaryen, was brought down was because a Scorpion bolt was
lucky enough to strike the dragon in what was probably their one vulnerable
spot, the eyes. If the bolt had hit anywhere else, it most likely would’ve
glanced off at best and at worst made a mere annoyance of a wound. Why do I
bring this up, you ask? Well, the last two seasons for Game of Thrones showcased Daenerys’s
dragons, Drogon, Viscerion, and Rhaegal as fully grown. And if D&D actually
cared about the lore then this means their scaly hides would’ve been pretty
much impenetrable. The first test we see is when Daenerys attacked the
Lannister/Tarly armies with Drogon and when a volley of arrows was sent at
Drogon as he flew overhead, they all glanced off his belly. Pretty accurate to
the lore, right? Well, not too long after, Bron of the fookin Blackwater, was
able to get a well-aimed bolt from a Scorpion to hit Drogon in the shoulder and
causing enough of a wound that Drogon fell from the air, almost crashing into
the ground before regaining control. At worst, that bolt should’ve given a
shallow cut to Drogon and at best it should’ve glanced off given the angle it
was fired from and where it hit Drogon.
I will skip over the second test of a dragon’s hide which was
when Viscerion was killed by the ice javelin from the Night King. I think it’s
pretty obvious that those were magical weapons and supernaturally sharp, so
there is no reason to question how they were able to penetrate dragon hide.
The third test, now that I’ve really thought about it, might
be the most irritating because of the weapons involved. During the battle of
Winterfell against the Night King and the armies of the undead, Drogon landed
at Daenerys’s command to aid Jon Snow, who was about to be slaughtered. Upon
landing, the undead started to swarm over Drogon and began stabbing, slashing
and hacking at him with knives, swords, axes and other kinds of edged weapons causing
Drogon great pain from the wounds and making him take flight to rid himself of
his attackers. In the moment, I was like “Oh, no! Somebody SAVE Drogon!”, but
now that I look back, I think, “I fucking hate D&D”. There is no reason Drogon
should have been wounded by those attacks, no matter how many undead were
attempting to tear him apart, because…DRAGON HIDE IS HARDER THAN STEEL. It’s
utterly ridiculous and just another example of D&D ignoring the lore to continue
their awful plotlines. There is no way
those crusty wights should’ve been able to generate enough force to penetrate
Drogon’s hide, and mind you, I am almost fairly certain a lot of those wights
were using dragon glass they’d picked up from the soldiers they’d killed.
Dragon glass is incredibly sharp but it is not conducive to combat because its
also brittle. Yes, as you have guessed, I am side eyeing the fuck out of D&D
right now. Slack jawed oath breakers.
The fourth and *sobbing* final test was when Rhaegal was
killed by Euron Greyjoy with a Scorpion. My hands are literally shaking as I
type this because that was one of the biggest loads of bullshit that D&D
lovingly tried to spoon feed us. Not only did they kill an innocent baby who
was just following his mom, but they also tried to tell us that a Scorpion bolt
could penetrate a dragon’s hide THAT deeply. BUT WAIT! DERES MORE! It wasn’t
just ONE Scorpion bolt. It was THREE. Fired in quick succession and ALL hitting
the exact same spot, with the final slap in the face being one that penetrated his neck. How the FUCK did Euron Greyjoy hit a moving target with a
SCORPION three times in a ROW in the EXACT same SPOT with fourth for good measure while also being able to
load Scorpion bolts (6+ ft ??) THAT quickly back to back to back???? So, not
only did D&D say “Fuck that dragon hide” they also wanted us to believe
that Euron Greyjoy was the long lost demigod love child of Apollo and Artemis,
the greatest archers among the Olympian gods. I hate them.
This has become a rant so I will bring up my final note of
inconsistency in regards to the dumpster fire that was the dragon’s storyline
in season 8. Our very good boy Rhaegal, was mounted by Jon Snow, in the second
episode of the season. While it was an exhilarating scene, something VERY
important was disregarded and overlooked. Jon Snow, him of Targaryen blood, had
mounted Rhaegal and there by Rhaegal, regardless of Daenerys being his “mother”,
should have bonded to Jon and Jon to him. They should have been much like
Daenerys and Drogon were. But D&D, in all their fuckery laden circle jerk,
had Rhaegal with Daenerys when Euron’s fleet attacked when he should’ve been
with his bonded rider, Jon. Likewise, there was ZERO reaction from Jon on Rhaegal’s
behalf when it was revealed that Rhaegal had been killed. It really goes to
show just how awful D&D were at adapting the material that many fans have
come to love on such a high level. They sacrificed much of the richness of the
ASOIAF lore in order to give us an ending that is now counted among the worst final
seasons ever wrought. Our watch may have ended but what is dead may never die
(translation: we are getting more ASOIAF series and D&D will NOT be
showrunners. Thank the SEVEN).
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